oh,what a brilliant idea

bring a blanket that is drenched in your scent and LEAVE IT AT MY HOUSE

and while you're here,watch me when you think i'm not looking

and sit REAL CLOSE

oh,but don't stop there

innocently brush against me

and don't leave when you say you're going to

instead,hang around for just a few more minutes

acting like leaving is the last thing you ever want to do

yes

you are a genius

a mastermind

and you may have just won

can i just say how much i love this boy?

he is my sunshine.

he will love me unconditionally for all of our time together.

he will never judge me.

he will never mock me.

he will teach me patience and kindness.

phinney,you are the love of my life.

i do not like this

i don't like feeling like this

i like a boy and i just don't know how he feels

and that is frustrating beyond belief

ridiculous

i am learning about patience.

and i don't like it.

stupid girl.

stupid boy.

i have not received a single text from a certain boy today

and i HATE that it bothers me

waiting

watching

waiting

watching

hoping

watching

hoping

waiting

it's strange that something i was so against

so afraid of

is now something i can't wait for

something i am anxious for

i'm not sure if i like that

am i truly ready to face that?

am i ready for the heartache that is bound to happen?

sometimes i don't like this whole...human emotion thing.

it kind of stinks.

i am so angry with myself for falling for this

for actually believing that a boy could actually like me

this is all a lie

boys do not fall for me

boys do not think of me as anything more than a friend

and i was okay with that,dammit!

and now here i am,SO ANGRY that i didn't get ONE single text from a boy who doesn't give a shit

i can't pretend to be happy about that any longer

i can't wait for him to move away

it's pathetic how self deprecating i am